Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Liberated

Thank you all for your e-mail(s) of concern. I know I said I would post more on Friday, but I just couldn’t force myself to do it at that time. So much has happened (as usual), it is near impossible to know where to start.

Friday I took Kay to the clinic for her near weekly blood transfusions. Before clinic, she had the scan that I posted about in the previous entry. My Aunt Sophie was to come in later in the afternoon to speak with the doctor about the results. The doctor stopped by to see Kay in the clinic before Aunt Sophie got there. I had stepped out for what was the second food run of the day (I will go on a million food runs as long as she is eating something). Per Kay’s request, the results of the scan were not given to her. Kay just simply told her that she had plans of things to do with the next few weeks and if she had less time, she would need to know. She was told to go forth with her plans. I came in as the doctor was leaving and she told me about the conversation. I didn’t know if I wanted to know the results of the scan either, so I just asked if her time frame was inaccurate based on the scans. She told me no, she didn’t believe it to be so.

This weekend held many memories in the making, both with Kay and with my husband Alex being here. Sophie started taking a new medication on Friday night which made her feel ill all day Saturday. Kay was exhausted from her week of busy outings, so we took the time to catch up on some movie viewing. We first watched Diary of a Mad Black Woman. If you have not seen this movie, I suggest you stop reading this and go get it . . . RIGHT NOW. This movie had a very profound impact on my life and I am not sure I will be forgetting it anytime soon. While the main plot was about love, it was also about losing something you love very much. A quote stands out in my head that applies to our daily lives right now; "We fight so hard to hold on to the things that God, Himself, is trying to tear apart ." So true, so very true to life right now.

We also took time to watch Coach Carter. It was also another great movie with a wonderful message. Pick it up when you go to rent the other, okay? One of my favorite authors was cited in the movie as to what our deepest fear is.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were all meant to shine, as children do. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Something to think about, I say. You can check out more by Marianne Williamson by clicking here. She has a wide variety of material out there and is worth taking a look at.

Sunday we as a family went to services. Kay made the choice to speak with the Pastor about being rededicated. We have spoken with him and that is set for the next service. Kay has always been a deeply devoted Christian, but as the Pastor said, it is perfectly acceptable at this stage of her life to want to know that all is straight with God. While Kay is perfectly content in this, the rest of us know what it means and aren’t taking it as well as we could be.

Monday morning Kay surprised us by asking to leave the house for the day. My in-laws were bringing Emily in for the day when they picked up Alex. I just assumed that Kay would want to be here. However, she decided that she just didn’t want to be here and I can’t blame her, it was rather chaotic for several hours. She took it upon herself to ask us to dial the phone for her, and she wanted to talk to Barb. After asking Barb if they could go out, she told us she was going out, to not wait up! She ended up spending the night at Barb and Andy’s and then helped to cook us breakfast the next morning. She even helped to bake cookies for Sophie!

On Tuesday evening, Kay had a massive seizure following several mild type seizures (undetermined type at this point). We spent the greater part of the morning at the hospital trying to determine the cause(s) of this incident. Basically all we know is that a stroke isn’t the cause and a bleed isn’t likely. Her Decadron levels were slightly lower than the therapeutic levels, so we are praying that this was the cause. It has been increased, so over the course of the next few days, we should be able to see a difference and a decrease (or a complete stop!)in seizure activity.

That about sums up our week thus far. Tomorrow I am taking Sophie to her follow-up appointment in Tulsa. Alex has made it safely back to Germany and Emily is with her grandparents in Ohio. I am very sad at this, having several days with Alex has been wonderful. Emily is growing up and I am missing it. She is just an absolute doll and it was hard to put her in the car and watch them drive away on Monday night. However, I need to be here and am just very grateful that Emily is so well taken care of right now.

I will post more by the end of the weekend, I won’t promise when. I literally have about two hours each day to spare and trust me, sleep is generally at the top of my list of things to do. Your e-mail has been a blessing. I can’t tell you what your support does for all of us, it is good to be so loved.

2 Comments:

Blogger ria said...

Shelly,
I don't know what to say, but I just want yo to know that I am praying for you.
I hope you find some time to rest and reflect. I am thinking of you. If you need anything just let me know :)
~Erica

7:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There is a Christian natural medicine doctor in Ca. who can cure cancer using all natural means. He's been practicing over 30 years and has never lost a patient who follows his protocol. He saved my life from chronic fatigue syndrome and Lyme's disease, among many other things. He can heal your aunt Kay. Patients have come in with less than a week to live and he has turned their lives around. I don't want to post his number publically but if you would like it let me know how I can send it to you privately.
I found your blog by doing a search for the story of Christa Wells. Her song "Held" sung by Natalie Grant has been helping me heal emotionally from all I've gone through the last 4 years.
There is hope! I promise my doctor can help.
Blessings.

12:03 AM  

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